Mothering is an imperfect art, just like the rest of living. At this point it is easier for me to identify my goals, hopes, successes and places that need work when I look at my parenting. With life in general, I still feel so unsure of what the point of it all is, of what I’m working toward. I don’t really expect to figure out what the “meaning of life” is, but I do hope to discover what the meaning of MY life is. It seems that the only way to do this is to keep living, keep looking within, keep being present.
On a similar topic, I read this blog post from Jennifer Andersen at Our Muddy Boots:
I agree with so much of what she says, and this is my response:
I would like to add that when we acknowledge just how much our parenting decisions affect our children, it can be overwhelming. As you said, it is a lot of pressure, and most of us have a long way to go. I try to keep in mind that a large part of my parenting goal is not just to model calm and compassion, but also to show my children that it is okay to make mistakes. When I have an interaction with my husband or my four year old that I feel was not kind or appropriate, we take a quiet moment to talk about how it could have gone differently. The important thing to avoid is constantly making the same mistakes and apologizing for them. If we are willing to be self aware, acknowledge our mistakes, learn from them, and integrate what we learn into our behavior, we will continue to grow and change as a family, without feeling that my husband and I are not doing a good enough job just because we “have a long way to go.”
Why we keep trying: