1. Stirring the peanut butter. Seriously, it’s so annoying! I know hydrogenated oils are awful, but so is trying to mix the oil back into the peanut butter, especially while holding my attachment parented baby in one hand.
2. Can’t eat on the run. Gone are the days of just grabbing a doughnut or pizza and a Coke. In theory, I believe that everything in moderation is wise. However, I feel awful and get really grumpy if I eat junk. I try to plan ahead and bring food with me, which brings me to the next thing…
3. All the dishes. O.M.G. it takes a lot of dishes to make EVERYTHING from scratch! Cooking creates plenty, add in the soaking and sprouting and fermenting that are supposed to make all the nutrients in the food more available to our bodies, and my kitchen looks like a science lab after a failed experiment. Plus, all the tupperware I need to bring healthy food for all of us, everywhere we go, it’s overwhelming.
4. Target is no longer fun. I know too much, and I spend the whole time there thinking about sweat shops and fossil fuels. There are a few household items that are worth going to Target for, but as we all know, the whole point of Target is to get us to spend a ton of money on lots of other things that are NOT on our shopping lists. They are so good at it! The last time I went to Target I came home with a cute dress for Ella, sunglasses for me, and a new book for Ben. Not so bad, but let’s just say they weren’t part of my grocery budget! I have to just send the husband at this point, and even he comes back with some piece of plastic for Ben. I don’t argue, because little dude plays so nicely for so long with a new toy.
5. Trying to live my ideals while still living in the world. As you can probably tell, I feel a bit conflicted about choices and priorities. I try not to make myself crazy with my idealism. Giving up processed food? Great. Cloth diapers? Not in a building where I share one tiny washer with eight other apartments! I have been on a path of conscious living since I decided to be a vegetarian in middle school, so I have had a lot of time to mull over what kind of impact I want to have in the world. Only now am I beginning to work out why, and what my choices truly mean, not just to the world, but to myself and my family. I have often wished to just be unaware and happily live without considering things so carefully. I don’t think that will ever happen! I will probably always over think things. My goal is to reach a place where I can carefully consider my choices, and feel confident in what I choose to do. I won’t always make the “right” choice, and that’s okay. I will make the best choice with what I know in the moment, and the next moment will come with new opportunities.
Here’s to working, learning, growing, and hippie living, even if I do hate the peanut butter!